Being me- I needed to write a blog post about my accident. It helps me to understand everything that has happened. After everything that has happened in the last 24 hours, I feel like writing this blog post will bring be some sort of closure.
I am so so so incredibly blessed. Words cannot event express the humility I feel right now. It was really bad. I was sitting at a stoplight in Orem (Here is the Google Map of where it was). I didn't even see it coming. Suddenly a car slams into me at full speed. They had lost control. This caused me to slam into the truck in front of me.
I remember those 2 seconds felt like 5 minutes. I don't remember seeing my life flash before my eyes. I don't remember thinking about what was happening. All I remember is hearing myself say "You're okay. You're okay. You're okay." These words are what helped me stay calm for so long. Smoke started coming into my car and I knew I needed to get out.
Some random guy-- I still have no idea who he was--was pulling at my door. When he couldn't get it open, he pulled my back door open. I then realized that the door was locked so I just clicked the button and opened the drivers door. He then came over to help me. He was yelling at me to get out of the car because it was smoking. I realized then that my foot was stuck. Luckily, I was wearing shoes that slide off easily. I took my foot out, then I grabbed my shoe and put it back on. The man asked if I could walk. I replied that "I think so.." I did not realize how bad the accident was at that point. I was able to walk from my car to the side of the road.
Everyone kept asking if I was okay. I was alive. I was remaining pretty calm. I called my mom. It was a miracle she answered as she was just getting ready to head into a show. She could have easily ignored my call. Then, my mom called Kevin while I called the girl I was meeting for lunch and then I called my boyfriend. Apparently I remained pretty calm because Gariet told me that he didn't think anything was really wrong when I was on the phone with him so he didn't even worry. Little did he know. Even my mom didn't realize how bad it was because I was staying so calm.
It was then I realized where the other car was. The car had swiped around and was in the grass of the church building on the other side of the street. I never even got to talk to the people in the car that hit me.
Kevin, thank goodness, was in Lindon. He was able to get there in 15 minutes, but it felt like an hour to me. Everyone kept asking me questions that I didn't know the answers to. Things about tow truck companies and if I wanted to go in an ambulance to the hospital and what I wanted to do with my insurance.
As soon as Kevin came, I saw the look of pure shock on his face. That is when I realized how bad the accident was and I lost it. I just started bawling. The emotion of everything that was happening came on me all at once. I then got checked out by the ambulance for my vitals. They strongly encouraged I go to the ER because of how much damage was done to my car. I opted for Kevin driving me to the hospital because I did not have my medical insurance card on me and I wanted to change out of the skirt that I had been wearing after attending a baptism that morning.
In all the same moment, I was talking to my hometeacher Wil and sending pictures to several friends who knew what had happened. People couldn't believe I was okay.
We went to the ER and I had to change into a hospital gown. That was a fun addition to the day for sure! I got X-Rays on my chest because that is where I was feeling pain. The only thing I can attribute it to is my seat belt or hitting myself on the my steering wheel.
Kevin dealt with all the insurance stuff- which I was grateful for. I just needed to take care of myself in that moment. Everything checked out okay. I was okay. I left with some prescriptions and a referral to a chiropractor.
The rest of the night, I pretty much sat on the couch and was being lazy. I just sat and talked to Gariet. I wanted to have a conversation that we had started earlier, but he made me talk about the accident and what I learned. I sat there and cried and debriefed everything. That conversation is what inspired this blog post.
It really is amazing to think how your whole life can change in a moment.
As soon as the accident happened, I immediately started questioning God. Why did this happen? Why wasn't I prompted to not be on that road? But then I realized that there were several things that could have been worst...
If I had been a few feet more forward, if I had been in the other lane, if there had been a car in front of me instead of a truck, who knows what could have happened.
So what did I learn out of this entire experience?
I learned beyond a shadow of a doubt that Heavenly Father loves me. He knows my circumstances and even though this accident was bad, it was not as bad as it could have been. He saved my life. He kept me calm. I know that the voice saying "You're okay" was not my own even though it was coming out of my mouth. God is real. He was there telling me that I was okay. I was alive and everything would work out.
I learned that the Atonement covers much more than I knew before. It really does cover our physical pain and our emotional pain. I have been leaning on Christ a lot in the last 24 hours.
I learned that people care about me. I have received phone calls, text messages, and a numberless amount of prayers from family and friends around me. This is a big one for me as I often question how much people care about me. I have received so much on going support.
I learned that I appreciate my life. I have struggled in the past with the desire to live. This kind of near death experience helped me realize that I do want to live. I do want to be here with my friends and family.
I also learned that I am where I am meant to be. Even though this awful thing happened, all the little things worked out. Kevin was in Lindon when he shouldn't have been. My mom answered her phone when she shouldn't have. I had all my homework done when I normally wouldn't have. These little things help me now that I was meant to have this experience.
In Sunday School this week, Morgan showed this Mormon Message:
A quote that I love from this is that "I have absolute certain knowledge, perfect knowledge, that God loves us. He is good, He is our Father, and He expects us to pray, and trust, and be believing, and not give up, and not panic, and not retreat, and not jump ship, when something doesn't seem to be going just right. We stay in, we keep working, we keep believing, keep trusting, following the same path and we will live to fall in His arms and feel His embrace and hear Him say, "I told you that it'd be okay, I told you it would be all right."
There is a lesson to be learned from my accident. I know that I was supposed to be there for a reason. Maybe I was there to save the life of the person in the car that hit me, which would have slammed under the truck had I not been a buffer. Maybe I was there to learn to be humbled. I am honestly not sure. But I was there for a reason.
I am grateful to be alive. I am grateful to be walking today. Thank you for all the support.
Come what may and love it!
I am so so so incredibly blessed. Words cannot event express the humility I feel right now. It was really bad. I was sitting at a stoplight in Orem (Here is the Google Map of where it was). I didn't even see it coming. Suddenly a car slams into me at full speed. They had lost control. This caused me to slam into the truck in front of me. I remember those 2 seconds felt like 5 minutes. I don't remember seeing my life flash before my eyes. I don't remember thinking about what was happening. All I remember is hearing myself say "You're okay. You're okay. You're okay." These words are what helped me stay calm for so long. Smoke started coming into my car and I knew I needed to get out.
Some random guy-- I still have no idea who he was--was pulling at my door. When he couldn't get it open, he pulled my back door open. I then realized that the door was locked so I just clicked the button and opened the drivers door. He then came over to help me. He was yelling at me to get out of the car because it was smoking. I realized then that my foot was stuck. Luckily, I was wearing shoes that slide off easily. I took my foot out, then I grabbed my shoe and put it back on. The man asked if I could walk. I replied that "I think so.." I did not realize how bad the accident was at that point. I was able to walk from my car to the side of the road.
Everyone kept asking if I was okay. I was alive. I was remaining pretty calm. I called my mom. It was a miracle she answered as she was just getting ready to head into a show. She could have easily ignored my call. Then, my mom called Kevin while I called the girl I was meeting for lunch and then I called my boyfriend. Apparently I remained pretty calm because Gariet told me that he didn't think anything was really wrong when I was on the phone with him so he didn't even worry. Little did he know. Even my mom didn't realize how bad it was because I was staying so calm. It was then I realized where the other car was. The car had swiped around and was in the grass of the church building on the other side of the street. I never even got to talk to the people in the car that hit me. Kevin, thank goodness, was in Lindon. He was able to get there in 15 minutes, but it felt like an hour to me. Everyone kept asking me questions that I didn't know the answers to. Things about tow truck companies and if I wanted to go in an ambulance to the hospital and what I wanted to do with my insurance.
As soon as Kevin came, I saw the look of pure shock on his face. That is when I realized how bad the accident was and I lost it. I just started bawling. The emotion of everything that was happening came on me all at once. I then got checked out by the ambulance for my vitals. They strongly encouraged I go to the ER because of how much damage was done to my car. I opted for Kevin driving me to the hospital because I did not have my medical insurance card on me and I wanted to change out of the skirt that I had been wearing after attending a baptism that morning.In all the same moment, I was talking to my hometeacher Wil and sending pictures to several friends who knew what had happened. People couldn't believe I was okay.
We went to the ER and I had to change into a hospital gown. That was a fun addition to the day for sure! I got X-Rays on my chest because that is where I was feeling pain. The only thing I can attribute it to is my seat belt or hitting myself on the my steering wheel.
Kevin dealt with all the insurance stuff- which I was grateful for. I just needed to take care of myself in that moment. Everything checked out okay. I was okay. I left with some prescriptions and a referral to a chiropractor.
The rest of the night, I pretty much sat on the couch and was being lazy. I just sat and talked to Gariet. I wanted to have a conversation that we had started earlier, but he made me talk about the accident and what I learned. I sat there and cried and debriefed everything. That conversation is what inspired this blog post.
It really is amazing to think how your whole life can change in a moment.
As soon as the accident happened, I immediately started questioning God. Why did this happen? Why wasn't I prompted to not be on that road? But then I realized that there were several things that could have been worst...
If I had been a few feet more forward, if I had been in the other lane, if there had been a car in front of me instead of a truck, who knows what could have happened.
I learned beyond a shadow of a doubt that Heavenly Father loves me. He knows my circumstances and even though this accident was bad, it was not as bad as it could have been. He saved my life. He kept me calm. I know that the voice saying "You're okay" was not my own even though it was coming out of my mouth. God is real. He was there telling me that I was okay. I was alive and everything would work out.
I learned that the Atonement covers much more than I knew before. It really does cover our physical pain and our emotional pain. I have been leaning on Christ a lot in the last 24 hours.
I learned that people care about me. I have received phone calls, text messages, and a numberless amount of prayers from family and friends around me. This is a big one for me as I often question how much people care about me. I have received so much on going support.
I learned that I appreciate my life. I have struggled in the past with the desire to live. This kind of near death experience helped me realize that I do want to live. I do want to be here with my friends and family.
I also learned that I am where I am meant to be. Even though this awful thing happened, all the little things worked out. Kevin was in Lindon when he shouldn't have been. My mom answered her phone when she shouldn't have. I had all my homework done when I normally wouldn't have. These little things help me now that I was meant to have this experience.
In Sunday School this week, Morgan showed this Mormon Message:
There is a lesson to be learned from my accident. I know that I was supposed to be there for a reason. Maybe I was there to save the life of the person in the car that hit me, which would have slammed under the truck had I not been a buffer. Maybe I was there to learn to be humbled. I am honestly not sure. But I was there for a reason.
I am grateful to be alive. I am grateful to be walking today. Thank you for all the support.
Come what may and love it!
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